Valkyrie's Tears
by Sweethearted
Summary: Cheery little shorts that explore the multitude of ways one specific girl can fall apart without one specific living skeleton. Angstiness abounds.
1. Bitter Laughter

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Bitter Laughter**

"_You had writer fantasies?"_

"_Doesn't everyone?"_

Valkyrie laughs weakly to herself. Squeezing her eyes shut, she clutches the manuscript tightly to her chest, burning the memory forever into her head. If... _When_ he comes back, he can live them through her.

One tear, filled with bitter laughter.

* * *

**A/N: Detectives can be authors too, after all. Just look at Mello.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~_  
Sweethearted._  
**


	2. Cool Disdain

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Cool Disdain**

"_Strong willed, intelligent, sharp-tongued, doesn't suffer fools gladly..."_

Why was she still here, a wolf amongst the sheep? The crowds of people huddled and shuffled around her, unconsciously marking her out as _different_. If he could see her now, he would be proud.

One tear, filled with cool disdain.

* * *

**A/N: This one quote amuses me.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~_  
Sweethearted._  
**


	3. Insane Misery

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Insane Misery**

"_Am I going mad?"_

"_I hope not."_

What irony. She was wrapped in a straitjacket, tied to her bed, with echoes of thing that might have been bouncing in her head. A living skeleton, master of flame... If he had been real, he would have been disappointed.

One tear, filled with insane misery.

* * *

**A/N: Mad girl- can you believe what they've done to you?**

******Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._**  



	4. Self Pity

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Self-Pity**

"_Do you want me to catch you if you fall, or...?"_

"_If you wouldn't mind."_

He had caught her then, and other times. Now she lay wounded on the battlefield, dying alone. He couldn't save her, couldn't protect her. He would have been sorry, she knew it.

One tear, filled with despairing self-pity.

* * *

**A/N: Delusive self pity, more like.**

******Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._**  



	5. Memory

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Memory**

"_You could hide. There are so many places to hide."_

But how to hide from memories, from phantoms? She was curled up on the kitchen floor, a knife touching her wrist. Maybe he would change his words, maybe not...

One tear, haunted by memory.

* * *

**A/N: Suicide. Lovely.**

******Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._**  



	6. Fierce Pride

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Fierce Pride**

"_The first element, water. We can't part the red sea or anything, but we have a little influence with it."_

As Valkyrie watched the waves move, she grinned fiercely. The mortals ran through the waves, escaping to safety. No, not mortals. Civilians. Friends. She stood with the other great elementals, keeping them safe for as long as they could. As the last got through, they let the water fall back. Weak, Valkyrie lay down. She couldn't care that she would be killed, only that others wouldn't. It was something to be proud of. He would have been.

One tear, filled with fierce pride.

* * *

**A/N: Fluff, for once :3**

******Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._**  



	7. Unfulfilled

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Unfulfilled**

"_You're a perfectly normal young lady, and after tonight you're going to go back to your perfectly normal life."_

Oh, if only. The sun set and the moon rose and the body that had been Valkyrie Cain split and tore, changing. The vampire loosed a yell of loss and hatred then ran off to find its prey.

One tear, never shed at all.

* * *

**A/N: I really want to see more vampire!Valkyrie stories. Make her even more of a God Mode Sue, yaknow? XD**

******Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._**  



	8. Finality

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Finality**

"_The earth power is purely defensive and purely for use as a last resort_."

She stood in the graveyard where the body of Gordon Edgely was buried. For the past few months, life hadn't been going well and she could see no other option. Sorry, she wanted to tell her uncle. Sorry, she wanted to tell Skulduggery. Slowly, she turned to stone.

One tear, filled with a dreadful finality, to last forever.

* * *

**A/N: The Earth Power is a severely underused plot device in this fandom, for some reason...**

******Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._**  



	9. Dark Satisfaction

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Dark Satisfaction**

"_It's rare that you get an Elemental straying so far down the dark paths, but it happens."_

Mistress Cain stood at the top of a cliff, fire held in her hands. An army of darkness stood at her back, and tension was high. They would storm the sanctuary and prevail, perhaps. She offered a soft murmur to the air then screamed her command. If he could see, he would realize how quickly she had grown in the world that was now her own.

One tear, filled with dark satisfaction.

* * *

**A/N: Seriously, this was written pre-Dark Days. I know, I can't believe it either. XD**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	10. Loss

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Loss**

"_They'll live out their days completely oblivious, and they'll die without knowing how great they could have been."_

Stephanie Edgley sat up bolt upright in her bed. What an odd dream, she thought dully. It had seemed almost real. But now... Her life was normal. Normal, normal, normal. No magic. No wonder. On an impulse, she walked over to her windowsill. It was worn, as if by repetitive use. How odd. But it couldn't be real. Impossible. She slammed the window shut.

One tear, filled with an inconceivable sense of loss.

* * *

**A/N: Normality- life is unbearable with it or without it.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	11. Bittersweet Joy

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Bittersweet Joy**

"_Names are power_."

The reflection towered over the dying Valkyrie Cain. The knife was still tucked into her hand, the reproach in the girl's eyes still visible. Why, her mouth traced. Why. Because, the reflection wanted to say, but she did not. There was no use. Valkyrie Cain was dead. Only Stephanie Edgley had survived.

One tear, filled with bittersweet joy.

* * *

**A/N: One of my favorite Tears :')**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	12. Loneliness

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Loneliness**

"_He has committed untold atrocities in order to uncover obscure rituals, searching for the one ritual that he, and religious fanatics like him, have been seeking for generations."_

At last, she had found it. Slowly, very slowly, she started to sing the chant. If she had to be deprived of everything she loved, she would make damn sure everyone else would be too. The sick, twisted being that had once been Valkyrie Cain opened the portal for the Faceless Ones. Maybe he would be ashamed, maybe proud. Who knew?

One tear, filled with a deep, unforgiving loneliness.

* * *

**A/N: Fanaticism. Always fun to write about.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	13. Uncaring

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Uncaring**

"_They lived apart from the mortal world, had no interest in it."_

A shadowy house, its mistress sitting in the eaves. Her dark dress hanging from the lofty beams, her smile cool. A curl of fire dances in her hands. She had feeling once, but that ended all-too-soon, when someone she cared for left. Only natural, of course. People leave all the time. People _die _all the time. Still...

One tear, cold and uncaring.

* * *

**A/N: Would you believe I wrote this before I had access to Dark Days? XD**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	14. Shocked Disbelief

April 3, 2010.

* * *

**Shocked Disbelief**

"_People believe all kinds of things when it comes to their religion."_

She was strapped to a cross, her life's blood pouring out of her hands, her feet, her neck... Living in an age which claimed religious tolerance, this was admittedly a shock. If Skulduggery had been here, he would have lied his way out or something, but with her...

One tear, filled with shocked disbelief.

* * *

**A/N: No offense intended with regards to the religious.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	15. Dizzy Chagrin

April 4, 2010.

* * *

**Dizzy Chagrin**

"_Every big spell has a hidden snag."_

Valkyrie Cain, dread Necromancer, stood at the portal between this world and the next. She was strong and powerful and certain of her success. How easy it would be, she thought, to erase the barrier forever. Smirking, she reached out to start the row of symbols. She was suddenly pulled in, her face shocked.

One tear, filled with dizzy chagrin.

* * *

__**A/N: Cocky and overconfident- Fletcher's not the only one with the right to be, after all.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	16. Hard Success

April 4, 2010.

* * *

**Hard Success**

"_I don't know. That's why they call it a mystery."_

Miss Cain is known the world over as the best detective on life, be it part of the Sanctuary or not. Following the recognition of her previous master, Skulduggery Pleasant, her aptitude in the field is widely praised. If only she weren't so _lonely_...

One tear, filled with the harsh reality of hard-earned success.

* * *

**A/N: Something tells me that I was attempting to be creative with this one.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	17. Wry Disappointment

April 12, 2010.

* * *

**Wry Disappointment**

"_I think you might have a real instinct for this line of work."_

She was learning the trade again, with the new best detective world-wide. This also happened to mean Tokyo, and the Sanctuary there. Her teacher was one Miss Glacia Chain, who had been born and bred a mage. She was the best, but still not as good as Skulduggery had been. Maybe if he could hear that he'd be smiling.

One tear, filled with wry disappointment.

* * *

**A/N: I know. 'Glacia Chain' is the most ridiculous name ever. I don't need to be told.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	18. Too Late

April 12, 2010.

* * *

**Too Late**

"_Your flattery is subtle."_

Standing in the old cemetery, in front of the monument they had erected. She let a single red rose fall from her loosely held fingers to the cold ground. She murmured a soft eulogy of praise for the mentor that was now gone.

One tear, filled with words said too late.

* * *

**A/N: I love the word 'eulogy', don't you?  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	19. Belated Understanding

April 12, 2010.

* * *

**Belated Understanding**

"_You can never trust her."_

Valkyrie stared at the woman standing oh-so-calmly before her. How could you, she wanted to scream. How could you? As if reading her mind, China shrugged. The gesture reminded Valkyrie of a certain conversation she had had with Skulduggery a long time ago.

One tear, filled with belated understanding.

* * *

**A/N: I suppose she's somewhat slow.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**_**  
Sweethearted.  
**_


	20. Blind Hope

April 12, 2010.

* * *

**Blind Hope**

"_Dealing with you is going to be a trial, isn't it?"_

She stares at nothing, lips moving soundlessly. Please, she murmurs, please. I'll be good. Perfect. I'll behave. Just... Just let him come back to me. Please, God. Please.

One tear, filled with blind hope.

* * *

**A/N: It was going to be Blind Faith, but, as we all know, that's redundant.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	21. Unconscious

April 12, 2010.

* * *

**Unconscious**

"_How was your night?"_

"_Uneventful."_

A strange woman runs toward me, eyes desperate. Stephanie, she yells. Stephanie. I'm not Stephanie, you know? I'm Valkyrie. Who is she? Rolling my eyes, I turn away. She chases after me. Who are you, and who is Stephanie? I've never heard of her. I've never met you. She stares at me. I'm Melissa Edgley, she says. Who's that?

One tear, shed unconsciously.

* * *

**A/N: Just change 'Stephanie' to 'Valkyrie' and 'Valkyrie' to 'Darquesse', and the tone of the piece changes completely.**

**Or something.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	22. Insatiable Curiosity

April 12, 2010.

* * *

**Insatiable Curiosity**

"_This is a dangerous business. It's a dangerous world that I'm part of."_

She backed out gracefully, muttering her apologies. She lived a perfectly normal life. She never knew when her old mentor was sucked into the Faceless Ones' dimension. There was something, though. An intuition. Sometimes at night, she would stare at the sky and just wonder.

One tear, filled with an insatiable curiosity.

* * *

**A/N: Once you escape the rabbit hole, you'll never find it again.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	23. Distant

April 14, 2010.

* * *

**Distant**

"_People are staring."_

"_Are they really? Oh, so they are. Good for them."_

The strong, happy Valkyrie Cain is gone. The strong, happy Stephanie Edgley is gone. What's left, you ask? A quiet child, never speaking, never looking you in the eye, never really living. Why should she? She lives in memories, after all, and memories are happier than always being _stared_ at.

One tear, distant.

* * *

**A/N: They usually are.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~_  
Sweethearted.  
_**


	24. Unnoticed

April 14, 2010.

* * *

**Unnoticed**

"_You've certainly proved yourself capable."_

Capable. Dependable. Reliable. That's what Valkyrie Cain is. Boring. Normal. Trustworthy. That's all she is. Another person in a near infinity of people, never noticed, never great. Capable. Dependable. Reliable. Boring. Normal. Trustworthy. Never stand out. Never have a voice.

One tear, left unnoticed.

* * *

**A/N: Compliments tend to sound like insults when you really think about them.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	25. False Bravery

April 14, 2010.

* * *

**False Bravery**

"_You're just the type of person who would __**never**__ walk away from danger, simply out of stubbornness."_

She stood once more in an army, defending the world from harm. No, not _the_ world. _Her_ world. _Her_ people. She would defend it, no matter what. She would never walk away from danger, as always, but this time she had a reason. She had a cause. Of course she did.

One tear, filled with false bravery.

* * *

**A/N: And also deadly pride.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	26. Desperate Fear

April 14, 2010.

* * *

**Desperate Fear**

"_I'm __**in**__ harm's way, so it's not your decision anymore."_

She was outnumbered, of course. She always was. This time, though, there was nothing she could ever do. Winning this battle was flat-out impossible. So she was resigned to it. She would die today and that was that. Even with that knowledge, she was still frightened...

One tear, shed with desperate fear.

* * *

**A/N: The head and the heart are two different things, after all.  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	27. Deranged Isolation

April 15, 2010.

* * *

**Deranged Isolation**

"_All manner of names suit all manner of people."_

Anyone who had seen them together at first would have called them polar opposites, different as night and day. The ancient skeleton and the beautiful young girl, the hardened, ruthless cynic and the innocent, quiet girl. Now that he's gone, though, she's unbalanced. Alone. And now you realize exactly how alike they were. Pleasant and Cain.

One tear, shed with deranged isolation.

* * *

**A/N: Silence doesn't always mean the same thing, after all.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	28. Half Hearted Exultation

April 15, 2010.

* * *

**Half-Hearted Exultation**

_"Surface is nothing."_

Of course, he would say that, wouldn't he? All these fool mages are the same- ignoring those beneath them. They don't even treat us with contempt - that would be noticing us. To them, we just… Don't exist. Sometimes, I'm almost glad he's gone. Almost, but not quite.

One tear, shed with a half-hearted exultation.

* * *

**A/N: I don't know about you, but retrospectively, I find the switch to first person quite a jolt.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	29. Helpless Grief

April 15, 2010.

* * *

**Helpless Grief**

"_This life isn't for everyone."_

Fletcher Renn sighed as he stroked the hair of the weeping girl on his lap. Frankly, he had no idea what he was meant to do, and that scared him. She was a fighter, wasn't she? She shouldn't be so... Weak, he supposed. Maybe this life just wasn't for her.

One tear, filled with helpless grief.

* * *

**A/N: For, as we all know, Fletcher likes her for her badassery and nothing else.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	30. Carefully Hidden

April 17, 2010.

* * *

**Carefully Hidden**

"_There's been some trouble?"_

"_Some."_

There was always that odd tendency to downplay things, to smile and say everything was fine. She put up a façade, always the merry, smiling one who hoped for the future. Sometimes, though, when she thought she was alone..

One tear, carefully hidden.

* * *

**A/N: Nothing like a little repression to screw you up. ^.^**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	31. Unbidden Recollection

April 17, 2010.

* * *

**Unbidden Recollection**

"_Fashion. It's life or death."_

Stephanie Edgley is the Mortal World's top fashion designer, with her eclectic, outlandish array of labels and styles. First there's Valkyrie Cain, black and practical. Then there's Skulduggery Pleasant, classic, timeless chic. Oh, and never forget Tanith Low, tight leathers, or even Fletcher Renn, everyday wear with that touch of whimsy. When asked where her inspiration comes from, she will smile and the faintest hint of water will touch at her eye.

One tear, filled with unbidden recollection.

* * *

**A/N: I actually cannot believe that I used the word 'chic' in the same sentence as 'Skulduggery'.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	32. Off Balance

April 17, 2010.

* * *

**Off Balance**

"_Can't go wrong with black."_

That's all she was, after all. Black eyes, black hair, black humor, black looks, black heart, black soul… And of course there was white. White skin, white smile, white nails… White and black and black and white, never any variation, never any favoritism. Perfectly balanced. At times, though…

One tear, throwing her entire world off balance.

* * *

**A/N: Yeah, I don't really understand the 'white nails' comment either.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._**_**  
**_


	33. Pure Loss

April 17, 2010.

* * *

**Pure Loss**

"_One glance, that's all he needs."_

Ghastly Bespoke can read people easily, taking their measurements and writing them down neatly. When Skulduggery Pleasant disappeared, though, Valkyrie Cain suddenly became very hard to read. Her emotions flared regularly, and she never said a thing straight. When she was alone, though, he might have found her very, very easy to read.

One tear, shed with pure loss.

* * *

**A/N: I get the vague sense that the tenses here make no sense.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._**_**  
**_


	34. Hidden In Plain Sight

April 18, 2010.

* * *

**Hidden In Plain Sight**

"_I see."_

"_You don't see, do you?"_

They were all so _blind_. In an earlier time, another life completely, she would have been exasperated, trying to make them see, but now all she wanted was to be unnoticed, to curl up and die. What was life, after all, without its purpose, its _raison __d'être_? Without Skulduggery?

One tear, hidden in plain sight.

* * *

**A/N: They never do.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	35. Split In Half

April 18, 2010.

* * *

**Split In Half**

"_He knew there was magic in the world, and he wasn't seduced by it."_

Valkyrie Cain, detective, could both acknowledge this and scorn her uncle yet more, for that was what magic was _for_. Stephanie Edgley, though, applauded him. Stephanie Edgley was still a frightened girl at heart, and the risks of her work were terrifying to her. Valkyrie Cain and Stephanie Edgley were as good as two different people.

One tear, split in half.

* * *

**A/N: I really like this motif.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	36. The Last Confession

April 21, 2010.

* * *

**The Last Confession**

"_He was mortal. He died. That's what mortals do."_

I, Melissa Renn, look around, trying to distract myself. The hospital's clean, sanitized, everything thrown into horrible contrast by the fluorescent striplights. Father stands by Mother's bedside, eyes sad. A doctor bustles by, having long given up on Mother. Hell, she's even given up on herself. There's a reason why she's still here, though. Her lips move. Skul, I love you, she whispers. I can see the life leaving her. Father can only think about how she was never his.

One tear, filled with that last confession.

* * *

**A/N: This was actually written on the 18th, but I have since edited it into the first person.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	37. Rejection

April 18, 2010.

* * *

**Rejection**

"_This isn't your world."_

Valkyrie Cain opened her eyes slowly, with a little dread. That had been a bad dream, a horrendous dream, but of course it wasn't real, was it? Her mirror was smudged with chalk, windowsill worn. Her protective clothing was laid out, yet the room was empty, somehow. Oh yeah. _He_ was gone. Well, good riddance.

One tear, filled with rejection, the pain of being turned down.

* * *

**A/N: I like the word 'horrendous'. A lot.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._**_**  
**_


	38. Strong Conviction

April 18, 2010.

* * *

**Strong Conviction**

"_You're playing with fire."_

"_Everyone plays with fire around here."_

I can taste danger. Adrenaline. Fire. I've been in this business a long time, and it's never lost its thrill. The only thing that could ever make it better would be if he was here with me. If he was even on this world, he would be. I know it.

One tear, shed with strong conviction.

* * *

**A/N: 'Strong conviction'? Really, younger!me? ...**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	39. Willpower

April 18, 2010.

* * *

**Willpower**

"_I can't leave this. I can't go back to my dull, boring, ordinary life, even if I wanted to."_

She was a full mage now: not overly powerful, not overly weak. Some would call her average, ordinary, but she knew she wasn't. Because she knew what ordinary was, and this wasn't it. He would be there with her, arguing her case if he could, of course, but without him she did her best.

One tear, filled with willpower and strength.

* * *

**A/N: I have yet to meet two people who agree completely on the definition of 'ordinary'.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~_  
Sweethearted._**_**  
**_


	40. Thoughtful Longing

April 21, 2010.

* * *

**Thoughtful Longing**

"_That's charming, that is."_

Putting up a show, the laughing carefree girl - well, it was easy. She'd been doing it most of her life now, and she was confident that none left on the earth could see through it. There was one, though, who could have, and she missed him dearly.

One tear, filled with thoughtful longing.

* * *

**A/N: I find it interesting that younger!me thought that this situation best suited this quote.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	41. Unexpected Mirth

April 21, 2010.

* * *

**Unexpected Mirth**

"_The best way to stop a vampire is with a whole lot of bullets."_

Valkyrie sits in bed, a pile of books to her side. _A s__take through the heart, _asserts one. _Crucifixes and garlic, _another. _Sunlight,_ one proclaims, _and__ running water. _All of a sudden, she remembers a far off conversation. _A whole lot of bullets._

One tear, filled with unexpected mirth.

* * *

**A/N: No one really agrees on vampires, for some reason.****  
**

**Falling sakura and silver bullets and broken-winged faeries~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	42. Lost

April 22, 2010.

* * *

**Lost**

"_There is no heroism in war; there are simply things that need to be done."_

The days blurred together and she began to lose herself in the endless, mindless flurry of movement and time they called 'war'. There was no time, to think, no time to consider, no time to save her own skin. Maybe if he were there she'd have something to live for, maybe not.

One tear, lost amongst the emotionless antipathy.

* * *

**A/N: And now I'm thinking _damn, emotionless antipathy would have worked too._  
**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	43. Stinging Memory

April 26, 2010.

* * *

**Stinging Memory**

"_A storm is coming."_

Everything was a memory now, the rain, pulling heavily at her dark hair, even more so. It was the joking times he had teased her for her imperfect control of water, fighting the Sea-Hag, escaping vampires. It was bravery, fear, joy and shame. She shoved it furiously away from her.

One tear, shed with stinging memory.

* * *

**A/N: In a weird way, I love the fluffiness of this one.  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	44. Cool Superstition

April 26, 2010.

* * *

**Cool Superstition**

"_Doors are for people with no imagination."_

She never walked through doors. Crossed roads. Ignored magpies. Let a full moon go by without incense and dancing and music. She was a superstitious child, though oddly sensible. He might have found amusement in that.

One tear, shed with cool superstition.

* * *

**A/N: I make her sound borderline sociopathic, but meh.****  
**

**Eyelet lace and hamadryads and bloodsucking leeches~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	45. Wonder and Joy

April 26, 2010.

* * *

**Wonder and Joy**

"_You'd be surprised by how many things we get away with that fall into the category of 'unlikely'."_

Every time she walks through the street, she wonders. She thinks. What magic is around her? You'd think she'd be a cynic by now, but all the odd, interesting quirks she's seen are still amazing. Never as amazing as him, but still. He's a tough act to follow.

One tear, filled with wonder and joy.

* * *

**A/N: I like making her seem childish.  
**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	46. Unnecessary Complication

April 28, 2010.

* * *

**Unnecessary Complication**

"_What the __**hell**__ is that?"_

"…"

"_What the __**hell**__ is __**that**__?"_

Valkyrie Cain, world-renowned investigator, is straightforward. She does not settle for _pleasantries_. No, that simply wouldn't do. Anyway, she is straightforwards. The only time you could ever have said otherwise was when she was with _him_. And that's where all the trouble began.

One tear, filled with the promise of unnecessary complication.

* * *

**A/N: This one amuses me unduly.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	47. Bemused Despondency

April 30, 2010.

* * *

**Bemused Despondency**

"_Think of it as an adventure."_

"_Why should I do that?"_

"_Because if you don't, you'll just become really, really depressed. Trust me."_

Tears in her eyes, Valkyrie glared at the ceiling. There was no way she could call this an adventure, no way at all. No, rotting away in a Sanctuary cell couldn't be called an adventure. Maybe he could turn it into one, but he wasn't _here_, was he?

One tear, filled with bemused despondency.

* * *

**A/N: Redundant title is redundant.**

**Eyelet lace and hamadryads and bloodsucking leeches~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	48. Determined Dedication

May 20, 2010.

* * *

**Determined Dedication**

"_Tales of horror are always more effective coming from a lady."_

Valkyrie Cain is an author, and a good one. Her prowess with a story is known well, presumably inherited from her uncle. In any case, she's good at what she does. She's the best. It's odd, though, how distant she is when you meet her in person. Makes you wonder how she became like this. He knows.

One tear, filled with determined dedication.

* * *

**A/N: I think this ties together fairly nicely.  
**

**Falling sakura and silver bullets and broken-winged faeries~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	49. Unprofessional Regret

May 20, 2010.

* * *

**Unprofessional Regret**

"_Guards can be overcome. A locked door can be unlocked. A wall can be broken. A shield can be pierced."_

Valkyrie smiled coolly and nodded at an acquaintance. She was known for her impartiality, her unswaying distance. After all, how could a detective be anything else? Maybe he was, but he was different.

One tear, shed with unprofessional regret.

* * *

**A/N: This is kind of off-balance, but meh.  
**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	50. Bold Rebellion

May 21, 2010.

* * *

**Bold Rebellion**

"_We live in a time of peace."_

Her hair is colorful; her skin is pierced, eyes sparkling an unnatural shade. She's a rebel, always has been. Maybe if she had been born earlier, much earlier, she would have fought with him in that war, maybe against him.

One tear, filled with bold rebellion.

* * *

**A/N: Not the best title, but I like the concept.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	51. Wry Amusement

May 21, 2010.

* * *

**Wry Amusement**

"_The truce is a house of cards."_

Valkyrie Cain is the greatest detective in the world. She wears loose, pajama-like clothing, and her hair is spiky and wild, but she is a great detective. She even arranges houses of cards.

One tear, filled with wry amusement.

* * *

**A/N: Deathnote references, yay.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	52. Frozen Shock

May 21, 2010.

* * *

**Frozen Shock**

"_He's kind of scary."_

"_That happens when you rarely smile."_

She had survived for years, fought many battles, before she came to see what it was that haunted Mr. Bliss. It was years before she realized. When she did, she was quiet for a while, and then she got on with her life, because that's just what you did.

One tear, filled with frozen shock.

* * *

**A/N: I like the symmetry here.  
**

**Crucifixion and deterioration and child-sized graves~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	53. Joyful Energy

June 6, 2010.

* * *

**Joyful Energy**

"_Climbing a tree was like falling out of one - easy."_

Valkyrie raised one eyebrow in minute shock. She lived a hard life, what with being freelance and all, so it was moments like this, when things went perfectly, that she lived for. Had it been that way for him too, she wondered.

One tear, filled with joyful energy.

* * *

**A/N: For some reason, a lot of these tears end up being pretty upbeat.****  
**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	54. Elation

July 5, 2010.

* * *

**Elation**

"_I suppose I __**could**__ do with some backup."_

Valkyrie grinned impishly at Tanith, hand darting out to grasp her own. Tanith smiled at her, and was such a rush to see her smile again, after so long. She could appreciate Valkyrie's own smile, for she remembered a time when it would only emerge for one person, now long gone though never forgotten.

One tear, filled with elation.

* * *

**A/N: This one's for Igneous Pride, she who requested a Tanith chapter.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	55. Reluctant Freedom

July 5, 2010.

* * *

**Reluctant Freedom**

"_I suppose you do share a penchant for raising Cain."_

Valkyrie Cain stares out her window, staring at the moon, imagination running free. It's the only time she ever lets it, for it doesn't assist her in her dull, Sanctuary desk job. Looking in her, you'd never understand her last name; never understand the girl she was around _him_.

One tear, filled with reluctant freedom.

* * *

**A/N: Let's just ignore the subtext and move along.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	56. Lightheaded Disregard

July 5, 2010.

* * *

**Lightheaded Disregard**

"_I read enough. I should get out more."_

China rolls her eyes affectionately at Valkyrie, sighing. You should read a hell of a lot more, Cain, she says, her lips caressing the younger woman's name delicately. Valkyrie laughs, though there is regret in it as she remembers the other who suggested that once, and, she responds as she did oh-so-many years ago.

One tear, filled with lightheaded disregard.

* * *

**A/N: Yuri makes the world go 'round~  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	57. Agonized Memory

May 20, 2012.

* * *

**Agonized Memory**

"_Leaving a puzzle box unsolved is like leaving a song unsung."_

She's singing. She hasn't in a while, since her life has mostly been relegated to silence, but for the moment she's singing. And it's his favorite song, of course it is, because the things he liked had always managed to worm their way into her regard as well.

One tear, filled with agonized memory.

* * *

**A/N: I think this is the first one I've really completely rewritten, this pass through.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	58. Discomfited Disregard

August 7, 2010.

* * *

**Discomfited Disregard**

"_They say my generation has a short attention span."_

She got out of bed slowly, pausing to wipe the thin sheen of sweat off her forehead. Brow furrowed with worry, she set about her life, trying to forget, one dream at a time. Maybe someday it would actually work, and she'd even forget the Skeleton.

One tear, filled with discomfited disregard.

* * *

**A/N: Can I just say that 'discomfited' has to be one of my favorite words ever? Because it is.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	59. Playful Regret

August 7, 2010.

* * *

**Playful Regret**

"_Right. Guessing games are over."_

It was an endless round of questions, of answers, never quite fitting. She hinted and joked that she couldn't figure it out, that the chance was gone, but no one ever really supposed that she was actually serious.

One tear, filled with playful regret.

* * *

**A/N: They'll get it eventually. Might take them until she's dead, but they'll get it.  
**

**Heartache and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	60. Uncertainty

August 7, 2010.

* * *

**Uncertainty**

"_What a charming history."_

As a historian, she read and memorized and accepted. As a curious young person, she _questioned_. Was this the truth? Was it really? Or was it just another cover-up, like the one that had denied his memory?

One tear, shed with uncertainty.

* * *

**A/N: I kind of like the cadence here, though it's pretty short.  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	61. Puzzled Frustration

August 27, 2010.

* * *

**Puzzled Frustration**

"_Every solution to every problem is simple. It's the distance between the two where the mystery lies."_

How could he have been so important to her that her whole world crumbled without him? How could that have come to be? Try as she might, she simply didn't _understand_.

One tear, filled with puzzled frustration.

* * *

**A/N: If I were to write this tear again today, it would be very different. But I like how this one is anyway.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	62. Fleeting Horror

August 27, 2012.

* * *

**Fleeting Horror**

"_I don't have time, and I've never had patience."_

The worst were the nights where she wailed and keened and _wished_, knowing full well that he wasn't coming back. They were dreadful, especially with that little part of her that stayed distant and just counted seconds till the sun rose, bringing reality back with it.

One tear, filled with fleeting horror.

* * *

**A/N: I am very happy with the words used here.  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	63. Second Guesses

August 27, 2010.

* * *

**Second Guesses**

"_We warriors have to look out for each other."_

She stared at Tanith's grave with dead eyes. _I should have been there. I should have saved her. I should have been there. I should have saved her. _Second guesses ran endlessly through her head, driving her slowly mad. _It's what he would have done_.

One tear, filled with second guesses.

* * *

**A/N: Somehow I don't envision her having a particularly successful romantic life in any of these universes.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	64. Desperation

August 27, 2010.

* * *

**Desperation**

"_They don't make them like him anymore, do they?"_

She searched the world, but it was impossible. She couldn't find anyone to replace him, as a partner, or a friend, or anything more. It was killing her inside.

One tear, shed with desperation.

* * *

**A/N: Perhaps not the kind of despair you'd normally expect, but despair all the same.  
**

**Crucifixion and deterioration and child-sized graves~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	65. Impatience

August 28, 2010.

* * *

**Impatience**

"_War is a delicate thing: it requires precision. It requires timing."_

She was restless. She didn't want to _wait_. The world was cruel, to force her to. He would have alleviated this restlessness, by laughing at her gently and chiding her without malice.

One tear, filled with impatience.

* * *

**A/N: I make her seem rather childish, don't I?**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	66. Nostalgic Frenzy

November 16, 2010.

* * *

**Nostalgic Frenzy**

"_Time is in short supply, but we still have it."_

There are clocks everywhere, she thinks. _Ticking _and _ticking_ and _ticking_ and _taunting_. He had a pocket watch, a pretty one, one that had reminded her so of Alice In Wonderland - Alice, trapped in a world she couldn't escape…

One tear, shed with a nostalgic frenzy.

* * *

**A/N: I'm sorry, but when the pocket-watch was mentioned, that was all that came to mind.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	67. Doubt

November 16, 2010.

* * *

**Doubt**

"_There are casualties in every conflict."_

There are casualties, and then there are the souls of the dead, hovering all about her, _screaming_ to be avenged, and then she wonders, really wonders, if it's all worth it. He had obviously thought so, but he was… Different.

One tear, shed with doubt.

* * *

**A/N: Different. That just about sums him up, no?**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	68. Self Mockery

November 16, 2010.

* * *

**Self-Mockery**

"_Who are you to decide when we fight? Why should you decide when we die?"_

Lives-thousands and thousands of lives-rest upon her now. The fate of the _world_ is on her shoulders. The thing is, the thing she'll never admit, is that _she can't do it without him_. She can't save the world on her own. She hates that.

One tear, filled with self-mockery.

* * *

**A/N: Or, you know, self-hate.  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	69. Deluded Lust

November 16, 2010.

* * *

**Deluded Lust**

"_You're a straightforward kind of girl, aren't you?"_

_Straightforward_, she decides, is quite insufficient for her now. So is _fearless_. She's the girl who's flitted from partner to partner - Fletcher, Caelan, Ghastly, even Tanith, even China, just searching for the one who's gone in them. She hasn't found him.

One tear, filled with a deluded lust.

* * *

**A/N: This one's for Miss Yvette Quick (or NerdySkeleton, depending).**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	70. Contrived Ignorance

December 5, 2010.

* * *

**Contrived Ignorance**

"_I'm sorry, but the war has already started."_

These days, she tries not to attract too much attention, and she tries not to listen to what people are saying. That would be too depressing. She has no hope for the future, now, so why should she know what that future would be? She's doomed in any case.

One tear, filled with contrived ignorance.

* * *

**A/N: Doom :D**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	71. Macabre Fascination

**Macabre Fascination**

"_A tad morbid, but then, who am I to judge? I'm technically dead."_

The graveyard around her is cold, and some would call it frightening, but it doesn't scare her. She's seen too many deaths, committed too many murders, for it to frighten her. She's even been friends with an animated skeleton, for God's sake, even if he's gone now.

One sharp, bright grin accompanied by a tear that glints of a macabre fascination.

* * *

**A/N: That was one of my favorite quotes when I first read the book...**

**Written December the Fifth.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted_.  
**


	72. Human

**Human**

"_Sixty years of good solid training is enough to turn anyone into a tidy little scrapper."_

She's a weapon, now. There's absolutely no denying it. She's a bloody little weapon, trained and honed to the point of mechanic precision. She can kill, and she can hurt. She hasn't lost all feeling, though.

One tear, undeniably human.

* * *

**A/N: Almost like a Cleaver, no?**

**Written December the Fifth.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	73. Hesitant Hope

**Hesitant Hope**

"_The scorpion stings the fox because that is its nature. You can't deny your nature."_

China Sorrows was wrong that time, Valkyrie has decided. She must have been, and that's why she can walk around and smile and keep it all together, and not stab everyone she sees until she gets her Skulduggery back or anything like that.

One tear, filled with a hesitant hope.

* * *

**A/N: The tone of this one is sort of experimental...**

**Written December the Eighth.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	74. Twistedness

**Twistedness**

"_You asked me what is my nature? It is a dark and twisted thing."_

The coils of thread slip smoothly between her fingers, and she twists and pulls them into order, even as she loses herself in her memories. Dark and twisted? That was a nice way to put it. Psychotic was another, of course.

One tear, full of all her twistedness and hate.

* * *

**A/N: Bitter retrospective-ness is love :D**

**Written December the Eighth.  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	75. Lunatic Honesty

**Lunatic Honesty**

"_Magic, then."_

All the doctors disbelieve me, somehow. They say I'm crazy. Well, they're wrong. I'm not. There really is magic, I really was part of it, there really is a girl called Valkyrie Cain, I'm not Dissociative, I _swear_, there really is a living skeleton… Well, was.

One tear, filled with lunatic honesty.

* * *

**A/N: Dissociative Personality Disorder (DID): commonly known as Multiple Personalities Disorder.**

**Hurrah for the psychos (for they already rule their own worlds).**

**Written December the Eighth.  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	76. Hidden Poison

Wednesday, January 12th, 2011.

* * *

**Hidden Poison**

"_There are times when extreme measures are unnecessary."_

There is no need to skulk around with blades, or to make arrests, declaiming the reasons thereof loudly. That's what he's taught her. And so she invites the deluded ones to tea, and there's arsenic instead of sugar and baneberries instead of cookies.

One tear, filled with a hidden poison.

* * *

**A/N: White baneberries look extremely cute and are extremely poisonous._ Don't eat the Doll's Eyes._**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	77. Revulsion

Wednesday, January 12th, 2011

* * *

**Revulsion**

"_Being a detective isn't all about torture and murder and monsters. Sometimes it gets truly unpleasant."_

The worst part was always, without fail, having to tell the families of the victims, if they had any. It was excruciating, watching the looks on their faces. She hated it, and she got the feeling he had too.

One tear, filled with revulsion.

* * *

**A/N: This quote can be twisted quite easily...  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	78. Boredom

Wednesday, January 12th, 2011

* * *

**Boredom**

"_You don't have to like someone to get something from them."_

As stupid as the advice had sounded at the time, it makes more and more sense, as she smiles emptily at each next Grand Mage, eking favor after favor from them. It's dull work, though, which is why he never did it.

One tear, filled with boredom.

* * *

**A/N: I love the verb 'to eke'. It's such a lovely word...**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	79. Sparkling

Wednesday, January 12th, 2011

* * *

**Sparkling**

"_People know something is cheap if it doesn't sparkle."_

In her youth, she was lovely with her life. There was every glimmer, every gleam about her that could suggest vibrance. She lost all that when she lost him.

One tear, sparkling and lively as she is not.

* * *

**A/N: Sparkles :3**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	80. Unaltered

Wednesday, January 12th, 2011

* * *

**Unaltered**

"_Dangerous people. It's a sickness, Steph."_

She thought everything was wonderful about it- the magic, the world, Skulduggery, everything. She was wrong. Everything that could be dangerous about it was. Nothing has changed, only now she's dangerous too.

One tear, completely unaltered.

* * *

**A/N: I love the way Desmond phrases things- don't you?**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	81. Hopeless

February 19th, 2011

* * *

**Hopeless**

"_When you no longer have hope, the fear evaporates_."

She's the prime exhibit of this streetshow of horrors, the main attraction. She is bound and she is beaten and she is hurt. The skin has been removed from her flesh. She has no heart. She lives. What's really frightening, though, is the emptiness in her eyes. There's no fear. No pain.

One tear, completely without hope.

* * *

**A/N: She's a being of the Nye now, maybe?**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	82. Wary

February 19th, 2011

* * *

**Wary**

"_That's the thing about allies and enemies- you're never quite sure which is which until the final move is made."_

She's like a hurt animal. Wild, unthinking, desperate. Driven. She doesn't trust, because she can't, because the people she's trusted have never been trustworthy. Not even he was. She knows that now.

One tear, filled with awareness.

* * *

**A/N: An injured animal, a wounded child...**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~ **

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	83. Unnecessary

February 19th, 2011

* * *

**Unnecessary**

"_Do what you must_."

She has a good life. She's got a steady job. She's married. She has a kid. She's got all this because she did all the things that were sensible, level-headed. She'd give them all up just to be with him.

One tear, completely unnecessary.

* * *

**A/N: Hmm. Sensible. Maybe not quite the adjective that first springs to mind when one thinks of her, but nevermind that...**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	84. Mistrust

February 22, 2011.

* * *

**Mistrust**

"_Do you know anyone who __**wouldn't**__ betray you?"_

Paranoia has set in, a gangrenous stain on her bright mind. She can't trust anybody these days, she thinks, and the saddest thing is that she really can't. Not since he left, that first betrayer.

One tear, full of mistrust.

* * *

**A/N: Ooh, the word 'paranoia' just reminds me of Uprising by MUSE now... Dammit :L**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
**

**_Sweethearted._**


	85. Screaming

February 22, 2011.

* * *

**Screaming**

"_Hush now."_

The silence is muzzling her. It catches against her throat and her lungs and no matter how much she wishes to scream and shout and protest, she cannot. She is bound. She is stuck. She is trapped. Without him, too.

One tear, filled with the screams that could never be voiced.

* * *

**A/N: Kehe :33**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	86. Unwilling Memory

February 22, 2011.

* * *

**Unwilling Memory**

"_**Everyone**__ can be killed. That's the one great assurance_."

Even he was. Even she is. And that's why she's propped up against the wall, drowning in her own blood, silent and still, trying to forget his face, his godsdamned grinning face. It doesn't work.

One tear, filled with unwilling memory.

* * *

**A/N: It never does, you know...**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	87. Misplaced Optimism

February 22, 2011.

* * *

**Misplaced Optimism**

"_Cheer up, everyone. Since we're all going to die horribly anyway, what's there to be worried about?"_

She smiles a lot these days. It doesn't conceal a rent in her heart, because there's no getting to that little slit these days, no way through her cheerful, positive outlook. She wonders if it's healthy. He would have worried, maybe.

One tear, filled with misplaced optimism.

* * *

**A/N: Optimism is more oft misplaced than not, I have found.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	88. Proud Memory

February 25, 2011.

* * *

**Proud Memory**

"_There is no such thing as winning or losing. There is __**won **__and there is__** lost**__, there is__** victory**__ and there is __**defeat**__. There are absolutes. Everything in between is still left to fight for."_

The cheerful words keep her alive, keep her animated, keep her talking. She stirs up the crowd with expertly concocted words- some her own, some of his own making.

One tear, filled with proud memory.

* * *

**A/N: 'Concocted' and 'words'. Not oft put together, but I think they sound nice.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	89. Calm

February 25, 2011.

* * *

**Calm**

"_When you die, it will be __**your**__ death, and your death alone. Let it come to you on your own terms."_

In retrospect, he probably didn't mean suicide specifically. Maybe he thought it an option, but not one he'd recommend. Not really. She doesn't think so, anyway. It's a suicide she'll die by, though.

One tear, shed calmly.

* * *

**A/N: Yeah...**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	90. Defiant

February 25, 2011.

* * *

**Defiant**

"_It will be a slightly less strange world without you."_

Her world is dull without him. Monotonous. Monotone. There are still fascinating things in it, beauty and light, but she doesn't care for them. They're nowhere as good as he was. She defies the world and clings to the memory.

One tear, defiant.

* * *

**A/N: Kehe :D**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	91. Insatiable Need

February 25, 2011.

* * *

**Insatiable Need**

"_You have quite an appetite for destruction, don't you?"_

She craves it now. She's addicted to it. She's addicted to death and killing and ruination. It's a dangerous thing to need, but she needs it all the same, as much as he did.

One tear, filled with an insatiable need.

* * *

**A/N: Ruination. Such a nice word...**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~**

**_Sweethearted._  
**


	92. Weakness

April 4, 2011.

* * *

**Weakness**

"_We need a strong leader."_

What is strength? She thought she had it once, when she was the leader of the Sanctuary. She finds she doesn't, and she wonders if she ever had it. If it ever existed. She has a lot of time to ponder, alone, in the quiet jail cell.

One tear, weak.

* * *

**A/N: Being figurehead of anything puts you at great risk, after all.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	93. Magical Joy

April 4, 2011.

* * *

**Magical Joy**

"_Magic."_

Her skin glows bright. Around her, the elements mingle with shadows, her Necromancy finally joining with the Elemental powers. She knows, in this moment, that she can do it.

She can save Skulduggery. She can bring him back. Finally, she can. At last.

One tear, filled with a magical joy.

* * *

**A/N: Exactly a year and a day ago, I began writing this story. Today, I have finished every quote I decided to write a tear for from the first book.**

**This last quote from the first book gets an extra line, a lot of happiness, and an insight into a possible ending. Sadly for her, as we venture on into the quotes from the second book, this tear shall be forgotten...**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	94. Singular Regret

April 22, 2011.

* * *

**Singular Regret**

"_The night breeze was brisk and carried snatches of laughter from the street below. It was a long way down."_

She missed strolling around freely while she was stuck as Valkyrie Cain. One of the myriad regrets she held. He was always the first on that list, of course. Even now, even as Darquesse, he's the first.

One tear, filled with a singular regret.

* * *

**A/N: The first Playing With Fire tear :D**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	95. Affront

April 22, 2011.

* * *

**Affront**

"_This is insulting."_

She frowns at the subordinate- a pitifully stupid woman. Clarabelle, she was maybe called. She can't remember. She doesn't care. She hasn't given a damn about anyone much recently- not since she lost him, anyway.

One tear, filled with affront.

* * *

**A/N: I wish, I wish, I wish this one could have turned out yuri. It didn't. :(**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	96. Calculated

April 22, 2011.

* * *

**Calculated**

"_I am very, very dangerous. I'm a killer. I'm a trained killing __**machine**__."_

Grotesque Mechanicals, their creator calls them. It's not a bad name, she thinks- they are indeed grotesque, and undeniably mechanical- or was it vice versa? They'll do, in any case. In his absence, she plots her little war, wondering just what he'd make of it.

One tear, calculated for the best effect.

* * *

**A/N: The phrase 'Grotesque Mechanicals' is from Oscar Wilde's poem, _the Harlot's House._**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted.  
_**


	97. Grim Confidence

April 22, 2011.

* * *

**Grim Confidence**

"_She looked everywhere but down."_

She's known as an excellent tactician. She's good at seeing the things that could possibly go wrong, and she's even better at seeing what can be done to stop them. She's so good that she thinks she could almost save him, if she could live that part of her life again.

One tear, filled with grim confidence.

* * *

**A/N: Almost, mind.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	98. Annoyance

April 22, 2011.

* * *

**Annoyance**

"_What kind of thinking is that?"  
_

Idiots. Fools. Retards. She's surrounded by them now, annoyingly enough. She hates it, hates being the most intelligent person in any room she's in. She misses being with him, when she'd always have someone to understand her words.

One tear, filled with annoyance.

* * *

**A/N: It's a seriously irking feeling, I swear. :L**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	99. Beautiful

April 24, 2011.

* * *

**Beautiful**

"_I'm an artist. Some people don't appreciate that."_

She has lines of barely healed skin over wrists and thighs and inner arms. They've got a strange, ethereal beauty to them, she thinks. A bit morbid, maybe, but what isn't, in her life?

One tear, filled with a weird beauty.

* * *

**A/N: 'Weird' meant in its original sense.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	100. Sweetest Revenge

April 24, 2011.

* * *

**Sweetest Revenge**

"_Some people don't recognize true talent when they see it."_

She has been passed over so many times. As a girlfriend, as a detective, as a _person_. She hates it so much. If he were here, though, they'd stand up straighter and pay attention. He isn't, but she'll get it anyway. No matter what it takes.

One tear, filled with joy at the sweetest revenge.

* * *

**A/N: Implied murder yay ^^**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	101. Smug

May 24, 2011.

* * *

**Smug**

"_What do you want? Why are you doing this?"_

Cameras flash at her, and the reporters are screaming their questions, desperately trying to be heard. She smirks a little, but she says nothing. What she's thinking, though, is that she's mostly doing this – ransoming their Sanctuary, their precious peace – because she can, and because she wants payback. For him.

One tear, smug.

* * *

**A/N: It's as good a reason as any.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	102. Pity

May 24, 2011.

* * *

**Pity**

"_You wouldn't know. You're just a kid."_

Her eyes flare at the drunken mortal man. How easy it would be to end his pathetic little life strikes her, and that's all that stays her hand. The thought that he deserves worse, that it wouldn't really be a challenge at all. It's the sort of thing Skulduggery would have thought, she realizes grimly.

One tear, filled with pity.

* * *

**A/N: Well, she hopes.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	103. Savage

May 24, 2011.

* * *

**Savage**

"_Time to die."_

She smiles a harsh smile, all black leather and cruel eyes. She is holding the knife to the rope, and they know full well that there's no way they're going to escape, short of a miracle. They're right.

One tear, savage.

* * *

**A/N: Sigh.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	104. Reminiscent

May 24, 2011.

* * *

**Reminiscent**

"_Next time they're going to have to send a battalion._"

She faces an army, a lone girl against line after line of well-trained men and women. She hasn't a hope in Hell, and yet there's no fear in her. She knows that he'd fought in things like this, and won. Not just from stories, because she had been the one leading the battalion, last time.

One tear, reminiscent.

* * *

**A/N: That would be pretty epic, no?**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	105. Dull Defiance

June 2, 2011.

* * *

**Dull Defiance**

"_I don't have a __**master**__."  
_

She travels the world and the seven seas, free as a bird. She is unrestrained by laws, mortal and magical alike, because she's damn well above them. Once he was gone, there was no one in the universe she was accountable to. No one that cared, at least.

One tear, defiant and dull.

* * *

**A/N: Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) is a Eurythmics song. You should seriously know it.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	106. Nervous Laughter

June 2, 2011.

* * *

**Nervous Laughter**

"_I'll kill you both!_"

Like a bitter heroine from a Shakespeare play, she stares at the corpses, shaking with horror and shock and fear. They are dead, of course, and by her own hand, it's obvious, she's still holding the blade, _why the Hell can't she remember this?_

One tear, filled with nervous laughter.

* * *

**A/N: Hahahaha.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	107. Poetry

June 2, 2011.

* * *

**Poetry**

"_I make murder into an art form."  
_

There's a balance to killing, there's a cadence to murder. She's perfected it, and the most important part of it is the atonement. She once read a book where the main character healed a person for every one she killed, and that's what she does now. It's the only way to stay sane.

One tear, poetic.

* * *

**A/N: The book referenced is _Alanna_ by Tamora Pierce.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	108. Mocking

June 2, 2011.

* * *

**Mocking **

"_Things were a lot different now."_

Everything has changed. She had hoped, once, that the world would stay mostly peaceful, stayed happily deluded. It hasn't, and she realizes now that she was the deluded one. She wonders if he would have laughed.

One tear, mocking.

* * *

**A/N: Knowing him, he might have.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	109. Frantic

June 2, 2011.

* * *

**Frantic**

"_It was the nightmares that came to her."  
_

She awakens, soaked with sweat and heart racing. The dream had been so real, as her dreams all are these days – too vivid, too bitter, too close to reality, for her comfort. The world lurches, and she knows she's dreaming still.

One tear, frantic.

* * *

**A/N: Those kind of dreams are the worst, don't you think?  
**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	110. Childish

August 3, 2011.

* * *

**Childish**

"_They were always eager to play."_

She smiles her happy, sweet, empty-headed little smile, looking about gaily. Her playmates are around her, half discarded, like the lifeless dolls they are.

One tear, childish.

* * *

**A/N: I've missed writing these by hand.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	111. Insane Determination

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Insane Determination**

"_That was the cost, she reasoned. The cost of living a life of adventure and excitement."_

She has given up so much, over the years, for the sole purpose of regaining him. She has sacrificed everything – friends, family, lovers, and so much more than that. It still wasn't enough, though, and so she'll continue to strive. For him.

One tear, filled with insane determination.

* * *

**A/N: Though, to be honest, all determination that culminates in absolute self-sacrifice could probably be qualified as 'insane'.**

**Crucifixion and deterioration and child-sized graves~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	112. Empty

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Empty**

"_The building now stood quietly beside its neighbors, humble and drab, its front door closed and locked and sealed."_

She feels like a façade. Not the kind that Skulduggery wore over his skull, of course, but like a building that has been gutted of any life and spirit it might have had, and left simply to be marveled at. That was how important he had been to her, how vitally linked his survival had been to hers.

One tear, empty.

* * *

**A/N: We've finally started doing that in Singapore. Gutting buildings and leaving the shells up. It was only a matter of time, I suppose...**

**Crucifixion and deterioration and child-sized graves~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	113. Intangible

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Intangible**

"_Valkyrie and Skulduggery had never used the front doors anyway."_

She has spent her life doing things the difficult way, the untraceable, unprovable way. It makes things easier in the long run, she has always thought. No one can ever blame her, not that anyone will, because they all know what would happen to them if he ever heard of it.

One tear, intangible.

* * *

**A/N: God help her if _she_ ever gets stuck in another dimension.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	114. Deadly Serious

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Deadly Serious**

"_A situation has arisen than requires your attention."_

Her attention is fully on the matter at hand. It always is. She has taken it upon herself to help those who need it, desperately or otherwise, because she believes, absolutely, that if she does enough to atone for whatever it was that lost her him, she will get him back.

One tear, deadly serious.

* * *

**A/N: Crazy bitch is crazy.**

**Falling sakura and silver bullets and broken-winged faeries~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	115. Broken

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Broken**

"_Still solid, but cracked, like something had hit it."_

Sanity seems so far off these days. She can't remember how it was that she lost it, that one thing that she had taken for granted, every moment of every day, but she knows that if she could, then she would just lose it again. It has something to do with him, is all she knows, and all she wants to know.

One tear, filled with the shards of a broken mind.

* * *

**A/N: I also considered using 'shattered'.**

**Falling sakura and silver bullets and broken-winged faeries~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	116. Carelessly Concealed

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Carelessly Concealed**

"_It is well hidden and well protected."_

She is curled up as small as she can manage, trying to make herself invisible, trying to make her existence cease. She is scared, despite knowing that no one could possibly find her here, not even he. She is so, so scared.

One tear, carelessly concealed.

* * *

**A/N: I feel like I should have played up the contradiction more...**

**Falling sakura and silver bullets and broken-winged faeries~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	117. Driven

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Driven**

"_I'll do my best."_

"Do better."

She works hard as she can, doing everything in her power to succeed, because she knows that, if she works hard enough, she has a pretty good chance of retrieving him, somehow. If it's impossible for a human to achieve, then, well, she'll just have to become more than human, won't she?

One tear, driven.

* * *

**A/N: I mean that like 'God', not 'vampire'.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	118. Unsympathetic

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Unsympathetic**

"_It was an easy kill."_

She kneels down, wiping her blade against the grass, watching the blood becoming once more a part of the earth. She knows that human life is sacred – if only she could really believe it, but, without him, she doesn't really believe much of anything.

One tear, unsympathetic.

* * *

**A/N: The gap between 'knowing' and 'believing' has always disturbed me.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	119. Respectful

October 1, 2011.

* * *

**Respectful**

"_He hadn't even needed to use his magic."_

She has been defeated, and so in respect she bows. She hadn't thought she'd ever find someone as good as he had been. Even now that she has, though, she still thinks that she'll never find anyone to whom she would submit to as totally as she had to him.

One tear, respectful.

* * *

**A/N: Perversion unintentional.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	120. Constant

October 2, 2011.

* * *

**Constant**

"_Dublin had changed dramatically since he'd been here last. The __**world**__ had changed dramatically."_

All around her, the world has twisted and turned to become almost totally unrecognizable to her. It disturbs her. It knocks her off balance, and so she is searching for some semblance of stability, even in his absence.

One tear, constant.

* * *

**A/N: I feel like quoting Hamlet now.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	121. Joie de Vivre

October 2, 2011.

* * *

**Joie de Vivre **

"_You're late."_

"I'm here, which is the main thing."

Her grin is wickedly lovely, something lovely and bright and impertinent in this grim, cold universe. It heartens others more than declarations of hate and war ever could, more than even he did.

One tear, filled with childlike joie de vivre.

* * *

**A/N: Before you ask how the Hell a tear can be filled with joie de vivre, it's a tear of joy, okay? ^^;;**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	122. Dominant

October 2, 2011.

* * *

**Dominant**

"_I do not tolerate insubordination."  
_

Queen of the world, or so it seems, there is nary a person who will defy her directly, to her face, who has suicidal tendency enough to tell the crazy woman she's wrong. It's sad, because she's just waiting for the one who will.

One tear, dominant.

* * *

**A/N: I wonder if she knows it's never going to happen.**

**Crucifixion and deterioration and child-sized graves~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	123. Nostalgic Calm

October 2, 2011.

* * *

**Nostalgic Calm**

"_Times have changed. The war is over."_

Lonely and tired, she sits by the fireside, crocheting and watching the Cat wander around. In her youth, she had joked with her friends that you couldn't really be a spinster without cats. Apparently this is true, as the whole set up was incomplete without an annoyance sitting around and squeaking.

One tear, filled with a nostalgic calm.

* * *

**A/N: Yes, I just compared Skulduggery to a cat.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	124. Hunted Terror

October 3, 2011.

* * *

**Hunted Terror**

"_Have no fear."_

My heart is pounding far too fast. My fingertips tingle, and everything about me has gained the strangest kind of clarity. I have no hope, and I am incredibly aware of my impending demise. Gods, but I wish you were here. I'm kind of glad you aren't, though.

I feel a tear on my cheek, filled with a hunted terror.

* * *

**A/N: Oh, First-Person-Perspective, how I have longed for thee.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	125. Delusive Faith

October 3, 2011.

* * *

**Delusive Faith**

"_Are you sure we can trust him?"_

She is not, in the general scheme of things, particularly gullible. She's not exactly a cynic, but she's on the way there. She's sharp, at least. Quick. Intelligent. When he's involved, though…

One tear, filled with a delusive faith.

* * *

**A/N: I will not make the obvious remark here.**

**Eyelet lace and hamadryads and bloodsucking leeches~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	126. Blind Determination

January 1, 2012.

* * *

**Blind Determination**

"_Loyalty was not in his nature. A certain amount of obedience, perhaps, but not loyalty."_

She looks at him with dead eyes and a sick smile. She'll listen to him this one time, because he makes sense, but not because she is subservient to him, because she wants so desperately to believe that the skeleton-man was the only one who could ever order her around. Sometimes she even thinks it's true.

One tear, filled with blind determination.

* * *

**A/N: 'Dishonesty' would work too, I suppose.  
**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	127. Submissive

January 1, 2012.

* * *

**Submissive**

"_I'm glad to see you're still in control."_

She is kneeling and she is crying like she thought she never would, and there is a fierce simplicity to her pain, a kind of laconic quality to her anguish. Above all this, there is her relief at no longer needing to be strong as she has been ever since he failed her.

One tear, submissive.

* * *

**A/N: A sequel-tear to 'Dominant', maybe? XD**

**Crucifixion and deterioration and child-sized graves~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	128. Excitement

January 1, 2012.

* * *

**Excitement**

"_What do you need me to do?"_

She is giggling as she runs, spinning the blade around on her fingertips, and she is truly happy now, as she chases down the life of another, as she hasn't been in God knows how many years. In the hunt, she finds solace.

One tear, filled with excitement.

* * *

**A/N: She really shouldn't be running with knives...**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	129. Aggressive

January 1, 2012.

* * *

**Aggressive**

"_There will be some obstacles to our work, some enemies we will no doubt face."_

There is something distinctly antagonistic to her demeanor as she drives the knife into his neck and twists it, relishing the soft sound of flesh. In this moment, she is truly in control, truly following her dream, almost like when she was with him. The only difference between then and now is in her targets.

One tear, aggressive.

* * *

**A/N: Also, how alone she is.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	130. Desiring

January 1, 2011.

* * *

**Desiring**

"_When she is alone, you will fetch her for me."_

She is predatory as she kisses, her hands sliding smoothly over the skin of her lover, just another beautiful girl in the long line of beauties that she has been involved with the past few years. She doesn't find them anything near satisfying, but she doesn't mind. The illusion is enough for now.

One tear, filled with desire.

* * *

**A/N: Like uncle, like niece.**

**Eyelet lace and hamadryads and bloodsucking leeches~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	131. Surrender

January 1, 2012.

* * *

**Surrender**

"_I knew you could handle it."  
_

"_It was a __**tower**__."_

The years have been long, stretching by almost eternally in his absence, and she has hated them and she has loved them and she has learned so much from them and lost almost as much. The one thing that has changed the most, though, is that she has learned to admit defeat, and she will do that the next time they meet, because he has defeated her like no ever mortal ever could.

One tear, filled with a gentle surrender.

* * *

**A/N: He really has.**

**Crucifixion and deterioration and child-sized graves~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	132. Worry

January 1, 2012.

* * *

**Worry**

"_Was it a test?"_

She lives in a world of uncertainties, of hurts, and so it is that she lives everything as if she is being tried, as if there is something trying to kill her. She wonders, sometimes, if this is the wrong thing to do, whether he would approve.

One tear, filled with worry.

* * *

**A/N: He would. He knows that it's always a test.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	133. Faltering

January 1, 2012.

* * *

**Faltering**

"_There will be times when I'm not there to catch you."_

For so long she has walked the eggshell-tightrope between living and dying, navigated the edge of the knife. Now, though, with him gone, she is not sure how she will manage.

One tear, faltering.

* * *

**A/N: She will, though. Somehow.**

Eyelet lace and hamadryads and bloodsucking leeches~  
_Sweethearted._  



	134. Hollow

January 1, 2012.

* * *

**Hollow**

"_This way, you'll never forget."_

She knits with a certain amount of determination, and every stitch is a moment of memory, sped through in a flash. She realizes with every subtle little movement just how much she missed him, and that tears her up inside.

One tear, hollow.

* * *

**A/N: I envision this as Valkyrie in her thirties, so not quite a spinster yet.**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	135. Apologetic

January 2, 2012.

* * *

**Apologetic**

"_That's why I was late. That's why you were alone."_

This is the part she hates. It always has been. She doesn't mind going out, risking her life for everything she holds dear, she doesn't mind putting her own safety on the line to make the world as nice a place as she can, but having to deal with the aftermath, with the problems she couldn't fix? That's a different thing altogether.

One tear, apologetic.

* * *

**A/N: She's just being silly, of course, but who is going to tell _her_ that?**

**Heartaches and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	136. Furious

January 2, 2012.

* * *

**Furious**

"_I could have been killed because you were tying your __**shoelace**__?"_

"An untied shoelace can be dangerous. I could have tripped."

For so many years, she has been docile, domestic, laboring quietly with a smile, as if she's happy to do it. When she snaps, it seems so uncharacteristic, so much so that no one believes it, and so it looks like it was an accident. She hates this as much as she loves it.

One tear, filled with fury.

* * *

**A/N: The temptation to now quote Hannah Fury is quite strong.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	137. Self Deprecation

January 2, 2012.

* * *

**Self-Deprecation**

"_I'm joking."_

_"Really?"_

_"Absolutely."_

Hunching herself small, you could almost miss her, almost think she's not there, and when she speaks, she speaks wisdom, but she says it so soft, so flippant, that you just won't hear. She doesn't mind, or she doesn't seem to.

One tear, self-deprecating.

* * *

**A/N: I like writing the slightly bitter, mocking kind of characterization Valkyrie doesn't get much. It's fun.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	138. Desperately Sheepish

March 16, 2012.

* * *

**Desperately**** Sheepish**

"_It seemed to amuse Skulduggery whenever she found herself at a dead end, or even better, back where she had started."_

She has lost it. She knows this for certain at half past three on a lazy Sunday afternoon when she tries to go home and ends up outside the abandoned mansion on Cemetery Road instead. She isn't sure whether to laugh or to cry, so she does both.

One tear, desperately sheepish.

* * *

**A/N: Probably one of the oddest combinations of words I've used in a while.**

**Sunshine and laughter and dead butterflies~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	139. Obedient

March 16, 2012.

* * *

**Obedient**

"_She let him lead the way."_

Her will has been stripped away from her, over the years, and now she defers to anyone who wants it. She used to be strong, but she's long given that up. It reminds her too much of the man who she used to think would be the only one she'd ever submit to.

One tear, filled with an empty obedience.

* * *

**A/N: Taking quotes out of context never fails to amuse me.**

**Heartache and syrup nails and cold, cold stone~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


	140. Infatuation

March 16, 2012.

* * *

**Infatuation**

"_The most exquisitely beautiful woman Valkyrie had ever seen, China had a habit of making people fall in love with her at first glance."_

When she falls in love for the second time, because he was always the first, she is absolutely miserable about it, as much as she is happy. The romance itself is wonderful. Knowing she's moved on isn't.

One tear, filled with hollow infatuation.

* * *

**A/N: Who this one applies to, I leave up to you.**

**Palsy and amusia and silent murder~  
_Sweethearted._  
**


End file.
